Seam Life
by Ellenka
Summary: Thorny road to Everthorne - friends to lovers in seven steps.
1. Hunting

All ownership of THG-related stuff disclaimed. I'm back with something very unplanned, blame Hannah. And check out the promptingeverthorne blog on tumblr, there's still plenty of time to join. This will be my (slightly revised) collection of all 7 submissions, loosely interconnected into a story.

* * *

**I.**

**The Best Haul**

**Sometimes hunting doesn't go as planned, but the best thing to sustain you might be right under your nose.**

* * *

What hunting partners we are.

We usually come back to our families with decent spoils, but today's only haul is going to be… me.

Not like I'd admit it, but I'm extra grateful I wasn't out here alone this time, and didn't have to hobble all the way back to the district. That would probably do my knee in for good.

Climbing that tree had been a bad idea, with its bark wet and my shoes muddy after a few miles of walking through the forest drenched in spring rain. On the upside, the ground I ended up falling onto after I'd lost my footing was soft enough, and might have saved me from a worse injury.

My best friend looked almost ready to laugh as he rushed to help me up from the mud. His smile died very quickly, though. I pushed his hands away and tried to stand up by myself, only to flop back down as my left knee buckled uncontrollably under my weight.

By now my pride might be hurting more than the injured knee - and that's saying something -, but I settle for gritting my teeth without a word. We've argued enough already, before I let Gale sling both our hunting bags across his shoulders, and then pick me up in his arms. I was half expecting him to just throw me over his shoulder too, like the sack of stubbornness I am. He didn't do that, and I'm having hard time deciding if this is better or worse.

It's certainly more comfortable, with my knees elevated and propped securely against his forearm. His other arm is supporting my back, fingers curled firmly around my shoulder. My own arms are clasped behind Gale's neck, holding on with all my strength to make carrying me a bit easier. At least I hope it helps.

It's also kind of overwhelming. Leaning against him, I can feel every breath and heartbeat, every movement of his muscles against my side. My hipbone must be jabbing painfully into his ribs, but Gale doesn't seem to care. I try counting his steps to distract myself from thinking too much of how warm and… nice I'm feeling in his arms, but lose count every time Gale asks me if I'm okay. Then I look up, forcing my eyes not to linger on his tense neck and parted lips, and sulkily grunt back that I'll live.

Home is too far and the journey is taking too long, but I'm not exactly looking forward to the moment when Gale drops me off at home for my mother to take care of me, and I'll have to live this whole episode down. Or to the moment when the pressure of his body against mine disappears and I'll have to tell myself I don't want to feel it again, and that shouldn't be thinking anything like that around my friend.

I shake my head a little to clear it. Gale feels my movement and looks down at once. "Katniss?"

With a bit of quick thinking, I look around. We are reaching a good place, a clearing close to the edge of the forest, with a brisk stream running through. "Let's take a break here, ok?" I say

"No, we need to get you to your mom." His voice is slightly labored, but he does his best to keep it steady. Of course Gale wouldn't admit he's getting tired, but since I've already admitted I need him to carry me, it's not like he had any dignity to lose.

I roll my eyes. "C'mon, I'm not bleeding to death."

"I know, and lucky you aren't, but-"

"If you won't take a break, I'll just have you let me down and walk the rest of the way myself," I say and smack his chest lightly. We both know it's a very empty threat, but I'm counting on him not to hold me against my will.

Gale chuckles quietly, I can feel it more than hear it. "Sure, Catnip, whatever you say."

He does slow down, though, and carefully sets me down on a flat rock by the stream, its surface already dry and sunwarmed. Then he lays both our hunting bags near my feet and stretches, his back popping loudly.

I watch him until he lifts his arms above his head, and his shirt shrunken by countless washing slips from under his belt and rides up, exposing a sliver of tan skin. My head snaps back to the gurgling cold water, too quickly but not quickly enough.

"I think mom uses ice for sprains and such," I say, stumbling over my words a bit. That's a safe thought, and something I do know for sure. For injuries like that, I can handle hanging around. It's the blood that sends me running. And my blood need a bit of cooling now. "Maybe this would be icy enough."

"Let's try," says Gale and fishes a rag that serves as a makeshift handkerchief from his bag.

"Ewww," I drawl, even though it's obviously clean.

Gale keeps a stony face and loudly pretends to blow his nose. "Only the very best for my Catnip."

I smack his leg with a laugh, and Gale jumps out of reach, grinning.

While he rinses the cloth in the cold stream, I carefully roll the leg of my trousers up, wincing as I drag the folds over my swelled knee. The skin is bruised and reddened, but I'm relieved the fabric's not torn. The old pants are patched up badly enough already, and my body will heal more cheaply. Or I hope so.

Carefully, I try to massage and stretch my leg. Gale's back before I decide to try and get up unassisted, and shakes his head at me as if he were reading my mind.

I bite my lip to stifle a gasp when he touches the cold cloth to my skin and ties it around my knee, tightly enough to compress it, but not dangerously tight. "Better?" he asks, absently running cold fingers down to my ankle.

I shiver at the touch, and at the pain-numbing relief. "Yeah. Thanks," I say with a smile. I'm almost surprised I don't have to force it out at all.

Gale smiles back, his eyes twinkling silver in the sunlight. "Ready to go again?"

''In a few," I say and lean back, turning my face towards the sun. The sky cleared nicely after the rain stopped, and I'm glad for it. Hauling me home would be much more miserable if it kept raining. "You deserve a breather, you know."

"Okay."

Gale gets up from crouching before me to splash some water on his face and the back of his neck. I watch him for a moment as he runs his fingers through his messy black hair, pushing wet bangs away from his face, and then close my eyes.

I open them a few moments later, startled by something soft that flutters against my lips and nose.

"Hey!" I sneeze, and try to bat it away.

"Something sweet for the pain," says Gale with a big grin, and tickles my face with the cluster of honeysuckle flowers again. They are blooming early this year.

I laugh and roll my eyes. "You didn't have to bother."

He shrugs. "They were right here. You know, when you have something good right under your nose, you don't let it pass."

Taking the advice with a shrug, I pluck a flower to suck out the nectar. It's tasty indeed, and we don't get sweet things often enough. I hand the flowers back to Gale to share, and his fingers brush mine as he takes one for himself.

.

The sweetness lingers in my mouth when I let him pick me up again, and allow myself to rest my head against his chest.

.

I ask Gale to let me down at the fence, and finish the journey home leaning heavily on his arm, trying my best not to limp too obviously. I'm still ashamed for returning injured and empty handed, and by the time we get home, my thoughts are dark with calculations about how much hunting time am I going to lose and how are we going to pull though. But Gale keeps assuring me not to worry, and mother and Prim seem more relieved that my injury is not too bad than disappointed by my failure.

Gale turns to leave as soon as he sets me up on the kitchen table for them to take care of me. "I'll go back to check the snares. Get a good rest, Catnip."

Without thinking, I reach after him, but I'm not too sure what to say or do. "Gale…"

He reaches back at once and squeezes my hand. "It's gonna be fine, partner," he says with a smile. "Trust me."

I smile back, because that's what I do.


	2. School

(I'm sorry, the challenge pretty much fell apart and so did my schedule, but I'll finish this sooner or later.)

* * *

**II.**

**Frienducation**

**Many things Katniss doesn't know, and one important thing she does.**

* * *

My little fall happened on Saturday morning. After spending most of the weekend sitting and grumbling in my bed, I almost trust myself to make it all the way to school on Monday.

Not like I could learn anything too necessary there. Most of the knowledge that has sustained me and my family for years comes from the plant book my parents have compiled together. And from experience. The Capitol is more interested in keeping us in school for the sake of controlling us and feeding us propaganda than in teaching us anything useful. Perhaps they reckon that if they keep beating their lies into our heads for long enough, we'll forget how to think and fend for ourselves.

I might be interested in learning new things, if education could take me anywhere better. Or if it amounted to more than the approved facts about the tiny sliver of a world that is our district, the labor we can provide for the Capitol, and the bombastic history of Panem that might as well be written in the blood of our ancestors. They won't admit what they have done and keep doing to us, of course, but all the injustices of the past seventy four years, and so many more before the so called Dark Days, are bleeding between the lines.

At least the basic maths, reading and writing comes useful, but the sign above the door of the toilets makes for better reading material than the Treaty of Treason we are supposed to know by heart.

As it is, I'd be better off hunting whenever possible, and stopping by at school just enough not to raise suspicion. I still go every day, though, to keep up appearances and to walk Prim there and back, just to make absolutely sure she arrives safe.

Tables have turned a bit now, with my knee still sore and unsteady. I wrap my arm around her shoulders, in my usual protective gesture, but end up leaning part of my weight on her. Prim handles it better than I feared, and does her best to stand tall. Barely twelve, she is a lot taller and stronger than I was at that age, and I consider that my greatest accomplishment so far.

"You've been walking me to school for years. Now I'll walk you," she says with a light laugh as we set out.

I squeeze her shoulder playfully. "What would I do without you, Little Duck."

The Hawthorne boys catch up with us along the way, starting later but walking faster, and Gale chuckles when he sees us hobbling together. He offers to help out and replace her, but Prim straightens under my heavy arm and indignantly refuses.

"Catnip must be proud of you," he laughs.

"She is," I reassure him with a smile.

* * *

The next time I see him, Gale grins and waves at me from the door of our tiny school cafeteria. He's two years above me and has a different schedule, but usually peeks in on his way by. I've come to anticipate that, watching the door like a hawk until I catch a glimpse of his face.

My answering smile fades when I overhear whispers from a nearby table.

_"What does he see in her?" _a girl whispers. Prettier, richer, better fed than me, I can see that much in her.

"Don't mind them, they are just jealous," whispers Madge.

She's sitting opposite me, with her back to the door, but by now she knows my routine well enough to know where I'd been looking. She's my classmate and my best friend apart from Gale, but doesn't know nearly as much about me as he does. Sometimes, I wonder why she prefers my company to that of her fellow town girls, and whether many of them have come to shun her because of her association with me. I'll have to ask another day, somewhere where they can't overhear us.

"Jealous of what?" I retort. "Of everything we have to do just to survive?"

She rolls her eyes. "You know well enough I didn't mean _that_."

"We are friends," I snap, ending the discussion before it begins. Luckily, Madge is kind enough not to pry directly, even though she probably thinks we've skirted around this conversation one time too many. I have no idea what would I say anyway – what would I admit to myself, or to someone else. So I'm left with only my own thoughts to nag me.

_What does Gale see in me? And what do I see in him?_

What does it matter? We are partners, we function better together, and we can take care of our families better when we cooperate. Seeing things is not the point. (However easy on the eyes Gale is, even I can admit as much.) We just find something in our companionship every day, something that keeps us going.

What do other girls see in him, without really knowing him as well as I do?

It's not hard to tell, I guess. Gale is handsome, certainly, strong, skilled, and devoted to his family. Even the town girls whisper about him like they want him. But they don't really know how he smiles at his little sister, how he frowns in concentration when setting a snare, how his eyes light up and how he seems to become even more alive when he slips beyond the fence into the woods.

They don't know how he smiles at me.

He used to hang around with other girls and other friends more, but lately we are spending most of our time outside school together, out in the woods or at the Hob or with our families. By now, I know about pretty much everything important going on in his life, and am fairly sure there's no other significant girl in it. Just me. His best friend.

But if a friend - and that's all I'll ever dare to be, I think - will no longer be enough...

Is he going to pick one of them?

Would one of the town girls who like to stare at him love him enough to do for him what my mother had done for my father? To marry him and leave what passes for a comfortable life in Twelve for the squalor of the Seam? Or would her parents handle it better and welcome him to their better life? Or will he end up with a Seam girl like me? And start his own family with the girl he chooses, the girl who chooses him?

(Haven't we done that already, in our own way?)

I've never asked him about that directly, but from seeing him with his siblings, especially with little Posy, for whom he's the only father figure she's known, it's not hard to guess he'd want that. Much later perhaps, but still.

I wouldn't, and that's where our ways might part.

Where would I be, then? I like to believe I'll take care of myself, and mother and Prim too, for as long as necessary, but with him it's just so much… easier. Better. I've gotten used to it, maybe have mellowed out a bit in the months it took us to build unconditional trust, and the years it took our friendship to deepen and to grow into what it is now.

Could he have something like that with someone else, the same trust, and the same easy companionship? Would someone else be able to make him smile the way I do?

Maybe not, but they could do other things girls whisper about in the bathrooms, sometimes with words I wouldn't repeat in front of Prim or words I couldn't even pronounce right.

Would that matter more?

Hard to tell if I'm being protective or possessive, but I insist I just want him to be happy.

But with how intertwined our lives have become, I can't bring myself to see Gale happy without me, or myself without him.

That would be... unthinkable.

I don't know where that comes from, but I imagine Gale taking some strange girl into his arms and carrying her over the threshold of his house, like men usually do with their new wives, and involuntarily clench my fist.

When I concentrate on the memory, I can almost feel his arms around me as he carried me all the way home from the woods. An oddly pleasant shiver passes through my body.

I fit there just right. That much I've learned for sure.


	3. Family

Hi again. Just to get it out here while I sort of can. The next one will be either pretty soon or pretty late.

* * *

**III.**

**The Question**

**One thing Katniss doesn't want to ask but needs to know**

* * *

April passes, and most of the pain in my knee with it.

The same thing might be said for me being a pain in other regions, hopefully. Mother and Prim keep reassuring me that I don't have to do everything, and Gale insists he's fine sharing his haul from the woods until it's safe for me to go there again, but I can't shake the nagging idea that I'm not doing _enough_.

Easing myself back into the belief that my family can support me too, after trying to hold everything on my own shoulders for so long, comes with a lot of grumbling, but at least my body appreciates the rest. I take bad things for granted more easily than the good, I guess.

Mother likes to remind me that I'm lucky the sprain wasn't too serious, and not aggravating it by trying to walk all the way home indeed helped. I have to look away from her after that, just to make sure she wouldn't notice the heat rushing into my cheeks.

Gale is that only person I have learned to accept help from, mostly because I persuaded myself not to see things he does with and for me as help, just as a flexible way of sharing our duties, with either of us contributing more when necessary. Just something about the way he helped me last time feels like _too much_, and I have a hard time stopping myself from thinking about it. I hope I'll never get hurt like that again.

Unless...

No.

How stupid would I be if I hoped for Gale to have to carry me again?

.

We go to the Hawthornes' for dinner. They have come over to our place the last few times, mostly so that I'd stay put and not have to walk more than to school and back.

Cooking one big meal for more people is easier, and helps stretch our limited resources farther. We've been doing that irregularly ever since Gale and I decided to introduce each other to our relatives and include them in our cooperation, and our families have pretty much grown together like us.

However much I liked my peace and quiet, either with only Gale or only Prim, I always enjoyed us being all together as well. With Gale's siblings around, it's hard not to laugh ever so often, and when we are all crowded together, the empty places on our tables left by our fathers feel a bit less gaping.

In the short, precious moments, I can bring myself to relax and enjoy the life we still have. Even if they last only until I get hit by the next thought about how we are going to afford dinner tomorrow or the day after that, how a part of it is bought by extra slips of paper with my name and Gale's in the reaping bowls, how there's going to be one with Prim's name this year, and how I can't prevent that in any way…

Sometimes life fills me with wonder, sometimes with dread, only the fierce desire to protect the people I already have and love remains the same. And while I could imagine many changes for the better, there are aspects of our lives I'd want to remain the same… for longer than they plausibly can, probably.

.

After dinner, Gale walks us back home. We say goodnight to mother and Prim, and remain hanging around outside on our little porch, enjoying the cool night air. We are sitting close together on the steps, just as close as if we were on our rock ledge out in the woods.

I don't know where the question comes from, or maybe I do, I've been thinking about it ever since I've gotten my thoughts in a tangle about it at school. It slips past my lips, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Would you want to have your own family?"

Gale looks at me sharply, probably even more surprised with me voicing the question than I am. I'm not really comfortable talking about it, and I don't know if he would be, and if I'm not giving away too much by letting it out.

"I already have one," he says cautiously. "Maybe even two."

"You know what I mean," I snap, sharper than I'd intended, taking my own embarrassment out on him. "I mean, with the way you love the kids and you've been taking care of Posy since she was born, I kinda think you would…" I fumble on.

Gale stares at me for a long moment, eyebrows raised, until I'm almost ready to bolt inside and stop talking to him until he forgets it. "In a way… yeah," he admits at last. "Somehow. Sometime. But... you know Posy's pretty much still a baby. Thought she'd tell you she's foow and all gwown up." He laughs affectionately, but I can detect a bit of underlying tension. "Rory won't be twelve until after the reaping, thankfully. I wouldn't leave Ma alone to do everything, taking care of them is still all we can do together. And…" He falls silent for a moment, looks up somewhere between the stars, and then turns back to me. "… I know I can't protect the kids from everything, but I have to buy them a few more years." He swallows hard. "The years we didn't have."

His eyes are shadowed in the faint moonlight, but I don't have to see them to know how exactly he feels. A sudden prickly pain erupts behind mine, and I blink a few times to chase it away. When it doesn't really help, I lean forward to hide my face, my forehead resting against Gale's shoulder. I was as old as Rory is now, a bit younger than Prim is, when I had to start taking care of myself and the rest of my family. The thought is terrible. They might be catching up with me in height already, but they are just kids.

So young, so precious. I can hardly believe I was ever that young myself.

Aren't Gale and I supposed to be kids too? We can still be reaped like kids, but we've been doing our best to take care of our siblings like adults for years.

I'm sitting still and should be at peace now, but everything suddenly seems to be happening too fast, the world spinning out of control. I'd feel nowhere near ready to add new people both to my heart and to my worries, not now, not in two years if I survive all reapings the _generous_ Capitol has in store for me. Would Gale be, after getting through his last one?

Gale wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer . Instinctively, I cling to him, and it makes me feel somehow steadier. At least we are in it together for now. I squeeze my eyes shut, but a few tears escape, soaking into the sleeve of Gale's shirt.

He cups my face in his free hand, brushing his thumb over my cheeks. "I know how wonderful it is, Catnip" he says, very softly. "Every smile, every moment. But I also how painful and hard and dangerous. You know it just as well, if not better. We were lucky Ma was so strong and healthy after she had Posy, otherwise I have no idea how we would have survived. But we did, and still have our hands full doing that, right?"

"Yeah," I choke out, fighting to make my breathing even again.

"I mean, Posy was born when I was barely fourteen. You think I'd have wanted my own kid that soon?"

I shake my head and snort quietly. The idea is pretty ridiculous. Even though… things like that do happen, to a classmate or two every year. I wonder if they choose to or just don't know how to prevent it. I'm not sure I would either, so I'd better avoid any chance of making such a mistake.

"And you've been taking care of Prim since you were eleven," continues Gale. "And your mom too. At least I never really had to do _that_. We are doing what needs to be done, but we are doing our best, aren't we?"

"We are." At least that much I can honestly say.

"And we'll have to keep at it for several more years. And then… we'll see. I would never ask you to go through with that, not in a world where you have to choose between paying a doctor and starving. And where we'd have to watch our kids stand on the square every year, if nothing worse. That will be bad enough with Prim and Rory, and then Vick and Posy. Unless you…"

I lift my head sharply and cut across him. "Me? Our kids? What?"

"I mean any girl," he says quickly. "I might want it, but not while we live here like this."

I recall his frequent rants against the Capitol, and I'm less inclined to believe he'd want to bring a new child into the world under a regime he hates so much. "Do you still think it would ever change?"

Gale takes a deep breath and shrugs. He knows best he shouldn't start ranting here. "Maybe I'm stupid for hoping, but I still do. There's only as much as people can take. Something has to give, sooner or later." He turns to me with a wry smile. "We are still young, aren't we?"

"Yeah, but young people fall in love all the time, and then do... all kinds of things. What if you fall in love?" Another weird question.

"That's not all that there is to falling in love, Catnip. You can love someone without wanting to marry them at once. Or to make new people with them, you know."

"Oh. Okay." I feel my face getting hot and I'm more intensely aware of how close we are, again. Was he really thinking about having a family with me? And not in the way we already do?

I can't decide if the thought is scarier than the thought of him joining his life with someone else.

"You don't want to marry Prim, do you?" Gale says with a laugh and nudges my ribs with his free hand.

I return the nudge, much harder. "No! You know very well I'm not talking about... that kind of love."

One of his arms is still around me, and the warmth it gives me is different, so different from Prim's hugs or phantom memories of father's embraces. Something about it makes me want to pull closer and feel more, of things I can't even describe. And Gale is just my friend, isn't he? The urge is subtle now, just a pleasant but slightly disconcerting background hum. I can shake it off and ignore it most of the time. But if I couldn't, or if he couldn't with someone else, where would it lead?

The silence stretches again, this time too awkward. I regret having brought it up in the first place. I don't want anything new and awkward to endanger what we have now.

Gale doesn't either, I guess, because he shakes his head and flashes me a grin, familiar and friendly, and tries to ruffle my braided hair.

"Sorry, Catnip, I'm not going to run off and get married. You'll have to put up with me for a bit longer."

I burst out laughing, quietly in case mom and Prim are already trying to sleep, but heartily enough for my tension to dissipate. "I think I can live with that," I say at last.

"You think?"

I roll my eyes and smack his arm. "I know."

He catches my hands in his, probably so that I won't smack him again, and squeezes them lightly. "Me too, you know."

Returning the pressure, I nod and then let my head rest on his shoulder again.

Good.


End file.
